First, if you need a reminder: it is okay to prioritize your peace amidst the turmoil caused by others. If you are feeling overwhelmed in a tense situation, you will not be able to help much. Restoring your inner peace comes first, for everyone’s benefit. There are strategies to help you maintain your composure in these situations.
Here are a few helpful tips to care for yourself when conflicts around you take a toll:
Disengage mindfully: When conflicts arise around you, give yourself permission to step aside. When possible, mindfully disengage from the situation to avoid taking on the tension and stress of others.
Physical relaxation: Once away from the situation generating stress, engage in physical relaxation techniques of your choice (stretching, yoga, using an ice pack or a hot water bottle to soothe muscular tension…).
Protect your energy by stepping away when needed: Communicate to your environment how much you wish to be involved or not in any given situation. Setting emotional boundaries is crucial for your well-being.
Seek professional support: If the situation you are in generates overwhelming stress, consider talking to a therapist who can help you develop coping strategies and guide you to get the right support.
Your physical and emotional reaction to the conflicts around you is a common response in sensitive individuals. It helps to recognize this as a part of your empathetic nature. In these situations, protecting your well-being is an important and valid priority.
Many sensitive people report they often tend to say more than they want, or more than the listener was ready to hear.
If you are aware you have this tendency, here are a few tips to help you manage it:
Pause and reflect: Every time you catch yourself adding too many details or a personal story in a conversation with someone, ask yourself “is this detail really relevant for the main purpose of my message?”
Often our mind is quick in creating associations or ideas. We invite you to pause for a second and resist the urge when you can. Use that silent gap to decide if the detail at stake is really relevant for the purpose of your message.
In doubt, leave it out – you can add this detail later, if needed.
Focusing on the most important information and learning to leave details aside ensures your communication aligns better and more efficiently with your intentions. It also helps in avoiding sharing too much information you might regret later.
Know your limits: There are some topics that are more delicate for each of us. Identifying them and Knowing your limits about what we wish to share or not, helps us walk into social contexts more prepared. If you do not wish to discuss your finances, your health, your choices, or any other topic that is meaningful to you, you simply do not have to.
Journaling: You can monitor your progress with this by journaling about how you feel about your recent conversations, and the amount of information you shared. Anytime you regret having shared something, take a note of it, and reflect on why you feel this way.
Seek feedback: People you trust and who want to see you grow and succeed can help you by providing honest feedback. Do they feel you overshared? Hearing their point of view can be useful for your progress. Nurturing honest communication in friendships will also contribute to building true and caring relationships.
